What is Coercive Control?
I really wanted to step back and bring you something light—a bit of a breather. Instead, God met me on the beach in the middle of a building storm. In a healthy marriage, biblical principles like patience and forgiveness are beautiful. But sustained coercive control is not a healthy marriage. Coercive control isn't defined by what another person does; it is revealed by what prolonged exposure slowly does to your mind, your body, and your nervous system. If you are living in a constant state of hypervigilance, it’s time to stop arguing with the weather and pay attention to the storm.
Through the Knothole of Pain: Love Will Prevail
Because of God’s love, I am the prevailing garden growing out of a grave. Wild and free. Grateful to be in a state of just BEING. Getting here was the feat. For years, I’ve studied God and studied people, and I’ve become convinced that most of us misunderstand the true purpose of Scripture. When we are trapped in trauma, we view God through the tiny knothole of our pain. But the Bible isn't a rigid index of rules—it is a treasure map showing us how human beings actually function emotionally and psychologically, and how vertical connection to His prevailing love is the only way to truly reclaim who we are.
Forgive
Forgiveness doesn't erase the pain of unimaginable betrayal, it doesn't mean we forget, and it certainly doesn't mean a relationship must be restored. Forgiveness and access are not the same thing. True forgiveness is a circuit breaker—a fierce, heart-wrenching decision to stop the spread of relational toxicity so it never reaches our children. It is one of the greatest expressions of strength under control, freeing our souls from a darkness that doesn't deserve to live rent-free within us anymore.